Entdecke die Welt von Shibari und Bondage mit Dan Apus Monoceros

Who is Dan Apus Monoceros?

Dan Apus Monoceros is a professional kink coach, bondage trainer, and Shibari artist based in Berlin. He has been working with ropes for over 20 years, offering shows, workshops, and sessions. He lives openly as a gay, polyamorous man. Dan describes himself as kinky, sadistic, and gray-asexual. He honed his rope craft through extensive trial and error, practice, and stage performances.

Bondage, Shibari, and Rope Bondage

The podcast makes a clear distinction: "Bondage" is the umbrella term for being tied up, whereas "Shibari" is the Japanese word for the practice. In German-speaking regions, "bondage" is often associated with gear-based restraints—such as handcuffs or leather cuffs—while Shibari is typically linked to rope bondage and aesthetic rope patterns.

Shibari as Art Form and Performance

Dan describes his rope shows as "Fine Rope Art." These result in visually powerful performances where bodies, ropes, and space transform into moving images. He rehearses for hours with his rope model to develop choreographed sequences. Dan also engages in free improvisation and live demonstrations, spontaneously playing with body positions and the model's reactions.

Pain, Pleasure, and Individual Boundaries

Shibari can be painful, but it doesn't have to be. Dan emphasizes that the intensity is always tailored to the model. As a sadist, he enjoys elements involving pain; at the same time, he acknowledges that other partners may prefer being tied up in a way that feels soft, comfortable, and "cuddly." Both approaches are valid and deserve respect.

Trust, Communication, and Safety

Trust is a central theme of the episode. Ropes create extreme intimacy because the "rope bunny" literally places themselves in another person's hands. Dan demonstrates how he continuously checks in with his partner during shows and sessions. Through eye contact, touch, and verbal check-ins, he ensures that everything remains consensual, safe, and emotionally sustainable.

Working with experienced models and newcomers

With long-time models like Timo, Dan can explore very intense positions; he knows their bodies and physical limits well. With newcomers, however, he relies on trial sessions and brief orientations. In public settings, he maintains a constant dialogue and turns people away if his gut tells him the collaboration wouldn't be safe or feel right.

Risks, responsibility, and consent

The podcast doesn't shy away from the risks. Nerve damage, numbness, panic, or circulatory issues can occur in Shibari if play is irresponsible or lacks communication. That’s why Dan advocates for clear, honest feedback. Especially when something feels intrusive or wrong in hindsight, everyone involved should be able to learn and grow from the experience.

Courage, curiosity, and taking the first steps with rope

The episode invites you to explore Shibari with curiosity and mindfulness. Respect your own body and establish clear agreements. A healthy dose of caution is important. Dan encourages listeners to experiment and gain experience—without ever crossing their own boundaries or those of the "rope bunny." Seeking professional guidance is advisable when necessary.

Listen to the podcast now

If you want to dive deeper into Dan’s experiences, concrete examples from his shows, and his perspective on Shibari as both a fetish and an art form, listen to the full episode on my podcast.