CBT and Pain as a Promoter of Pleasure

Guest post by Dominus Berlin

CBT stands for Cock and Ball Training. It is a form of play involving pain techniques—ranging from mild to intense—applied to the penis and testicles to sexually stimulate both partners. Personally, this is the technique I enjoy most (aside from nipple torture). You can really let your imagination run wild here. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise: sure, a larger "baby-maker" offers a bigger target than a smaller one, but the effects are the same, so size makes little difference in this case.

Since I am one of the few male dominants working in professional studios, I use women's nylon stockings for binding and as a torture tool. Most gay men are, of course, extremely puzzled when I show up with worn-out women's stockings, but the effect is fantastic nonetheless, and I recommend it to everyone. It takes no time at all to tie a nice knot around the "family jewels," creating an instant torture device; all you have to do is slowly pull the ends to tighten the knot. Look your partner in the eye while doing this; the moment you see that first flinch, you’ve established your dominance and can start playing with that sensation. Then, keep tightening very slowly, or perhaps in small, incremental tugs. Just like with many other toys, he will eventually get used to the pain, and the intensity will subside. Once the tension in his eyes has faded—tighten another millimeter, and so on.

The only drawback from my point of view: I can't play around with myself so nicely that I can get excited about the fact that my playing partner is doing it so well for me and that he can feel me.

As always when removing it: approach it carefully, but not too carefully. You can tear off a plaster quickly, so don't fiddle with it for so long. The pain when making off (worst after “coming”) is not erotic, because not all pain is the same - more on that in a moment.

Back to CBT. The sensitivity of the testicles makes playing games there incredibly easy, because all you have to do is take it in your hand and squeeze it.

Note: The smaller testicle is usually the most sensitive. Here, too, you can simply apply a little more pressure to express your desire for your partner.

Wearing leather gloves can add an extra layer of appeal for a leather fetishist. Once you have pulled the testicles taut, you can achieve a great effect by lightly tapping the stretched skin with your other hand. A gear-shaped tool also works wonders on skin that has been pulled taut. A leather paddle—used first for light, gentle taps and later for firmer strokes against the testicles—is guaranteed to be effective. This technique also works on the cock, provided the size and erection allow for it. However, the erection will usually subside; don't be surprised or take it personally.

You should also stroke your partner occasionally to show your appreciation and simply give him a break. Stroking improves blood circulation and can help alleviate pain. So, if things clearly become too intense, stroke the area to soothe it and make amends.

Here is a brief digression on the subject of pain for beginners: what has just been described is "pleasurable pain." It is controlled, typically escalates from gentle to intense, remains linked to the active partner's sense of pleasure, and ideally operates right at the limits of the passive partner's tolerance. That is why the pain experienced when removing a constriction—such as a tie or clamp—can be just as erotic as the sensation of the passive partner accidentally falling to the floor and bruising a knee.

So, here is my call to all aspiring female and male Doms out there: if you don't visibly link the pain to your pleasure, you won't have much success.

So, here is my call to all aspiring female and male Doms out there: if you don't visibly link the pain to your lust, you won't have much success. The game is only truly erotic when your sexuality, your personality, and your sexual essence can be felt.

Another category is "educational" pain. This kind of pain is allowed to push past boundaries. Has your slave done something wrong, and you want to punish him for it? Always ensure there is a valid reason. If your play partner has done everything right but you spank him anyway, he won't find it erotic—he’ll just think it’s unfair. So pull yourself together and stay grounded; the price for having every infraction held against you is the need for a realistic, clear head. Discipline can be sexy, but you have to earn it. If you realize your slave has truly messed up, then bring on the disciplinary measures. You shouldn't inflict the kind of pleasurable, sensual pain mentioned earlier in this context; that would send the wrong message. I love laying into someone hard with a cane—ideally announcing beforehand exactly how many strokes he’s in for because, say, he arrived late. In fact, even if this pain goes light-years beyond the slave's usual limits, it is perceived as pleasurable on a different level; it completes the image of the Master's strength and superiority, placing the slave in that small, malleable corner defined by you. Action demands reaction, so a painful punishment following a mistake feels like closing the loop.